This Season of Motherhood, part I

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So, if you haven’t noticed, I have a blog.

Oh this little thing?

Yes. It’s called a blog. I also have a Facebook page, a Twitter account, a Pinterest page and Instagram. On all those social media channels, I get countless comments from people who think I’m wonder woman.

How do you do it all?” they ask.

You live such a charmed life!” they say.

You make motherhood look so effortless!” they email.

What’s your secret?” they ask.

Well, folks, I hate to break it to you but I’m just another average joe that is trying to make it to bedtime without murdering a toddler.

Contrary to popular belief, I DON’T do it all, I DON’T live a charmed life, things are NOT easy and I have NO secrets.

I’m just a normal person who happens to put her life and recipes online. That’s all.

To be honest, I think my life is pretty…unpretty{?!} for a young-ish mother of 3 and I’m going to prove it to you.

So, here lies my first installment of This Season of Motherhood. Enjoy?!

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I got thrown up on thrice today. That’s fun and warm and uncomfortable.

I try to not apply makeup in the morning mid-afternoon because by the end of the day, I’m too tired to wash it off.

My showers typically happen between 2 and 5pm. But, the average number of showers I get a week? I almost don’t want to say because it’s embarrassing.

I get woken up anywhere between 2 and 9 times a night to rock/feed/change/swaddle my 7 week old.

It makes me want to die every morning when 8am rolls around.

My house is a disaster and most days I don’t do laundry or dishes. Or make my bed. I will get dressed though, so, there’s that glimmer of hope.

My lunch of choice as of late is a handful of almonds and a ladle spoon of nutella.

Speaking of nutella, I won that Dietbet I was talking about a few weeks ago…by literally .1 pounds. Thank you breastfeeding.

I eat all my treats hiding behind something/someone because I just don’t have the energy to deal with nagging kids who want what I have.

I get my husband to bring me home large diet cokes from McDonalds because I need energy slash they’re only $1 slash I might be addicted?

Most days I forget to check my email…..and possibly brush my teeth.

I’m not a drinking woman, but I feel like my toddler could turn me into one.

I got the book Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child from Barnes and Noble about a month ago. Guess how many chapters I’ve read? Um, none. Unless reading half of the introduction counts? I’m too tired to read. Oh the irony.

Whenever my husband leaves to go anywhere without me, I tell him to not die. Because if he dies, it’ll make me want to die. #3kidsalone? #nothanks

My daughter has too much homework on the weekdays that she just doesn’t have time to do chores to clean this blasted house. Damn you common core!

The library books we checked out who knows when are absurdly overdue. Guess some other little kids won’t be torturing their parents with Busytown books.

Most days, I just want to nap for more than 10 uninterrupted minutes. Incase you’re wondering, that IS too much to ask at my house.

Date night? What is this date night you speak of?

My personal space is forever being violated. No you cannot sit on my lap.

By bedtime, I take a handful of narcotics vitamins and hit the hay…for a solid 2 hours before I’m up again.

It’s like a merry go round, except not as pleasant. Or musical.

 

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So there you have it. Not so glamorous after all.

 

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go scream into a pillow.

Have a wonderful, well rested weekend!

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  1. I think you’ve just described most of our days as moms (especially mine, except I don’t have a blog, kid #3 is 7 months away (announced on DietBet!), and I didn’t get thrown up on today- yet). I won that DietBet with you (thank you Morning Sickness) , and my library books are missing as well (I could swear I turned them in to that defunct library scanning machine that died halfway through, but alas the library says I still have them.. maybe my 2 yr old can show me where she hid them this weekend). Oh, and that shower thing? Yeah… Don’t ask me when the last one was. I look fine, and Im wearing clean.. sweats. And I haven’t left the house so no harm, no foul (pun intended). You give moms like us HOPE that we can get a little MORE done each day (even if you admit you don’t- what we don’t know won’t hurt us, love). Just know we have your back, we love seeing all that you decide to share, and Im still hoping to get the courage up enough to say hi to you when I see you at TOFW someday.. I saw you last time, but we all know mamas usually don’t get time to have a meal quietly, so I held off. But someday! And I might bring you some Nutella and almonds when I do!

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  2. Hang in there girl… this is exactly how it’s supposed to be! You’re rocking the mom thing! Take it from someone who has been right where you are now. To be honest, I think I went completely insane for a year or two when my third came along. I’m not really sure… I blocked it all out! But there’s a light at the end of that tunnel. You can’t see it yet, but you will, and it will be too soon!!!

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  3. Love, Love, Love Happy Sleep Habits, Happy Child! I’ve followed it with both my children and it’s the best thing ever. Some turn their noses up at how early our kids go to bed (6 year old – 7:00 and 1 year old – 6/6:30) BUT that few hours at home alone with my husband is priceless. It keeps us sane 🙂 Good luck, love your blog.

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  4. Ha, ok so I only have a 5 year old and a 9 month old but I can relate, I work full time out of the house, my kitchen floor hasn’t been swept in like a month…we also have a dog and a cat so they keep the food of the floor, there is just hair and dirt everywhere, my 9 month old doesn’t sleep generally more than 2 hours at a time or take naps…I literally try to sleep in my office while I am pumping my milk during the workdays…it’s just a season and I need to enjoy it and I do but I still wish for more sleep!!

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  5. Oh man. I feel ya. This having three kids thing is no joke.
    It sounds like your little guy is similar to how my second was. Leo would scream if he wasn’t being held, and he literally slept for two hours–three tops–at a time for the first fourteen months of his life. Life seemed basically impossible then, and the lack of sleep made me feel like a monster/contributed majorly to some postpartum blues. It was so dang hard.
    I hope you aren’t being too hard on yourself. You’re doing much better than you think you are. And your family is beautiful. Hang in there!

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  6. I love this, it is so true. My little man is almost 6 months and it’s been a wild ride, but I wouldn’t trade it for the world. Trying to balance a home life and working full time has been the toughest thing I’ve ever had to do. And I’m so exhausted.

    And McDonald’s diet cokes really are the best! I get one every morning before work.

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  7. I love how honest you are in your blog… As my season of babies and toddlers is over, I know exactly how you feel and thank you for sharing your honesty. I think most moms look at other moms and wonder how they do it, and why can’t I be Supermom… The truth is most mothers of infants and toddlers are just taking it a day at a time. Enjoy this hectic time in your life because believe it or not you will miss it…. (well not the sleepless nights and getting thrown up on) I am 39 and have a 20 year old and a 15 year old and miss my kids being little.

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  8. You’re so cute! And you are funny. And yes being a mom is very hard! And tiring! Look for those moments in a day that make you smile. We all know we wouldn’t trade our kids for anything. Hang in there. It will get easier. One day at a time! Pray lots!

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  9. I heard a phrase “Never compare your rough cut to someone elses highlight reel” So many moms put only the good stuff out on social media to make it look so effortless because they worry what others will think so thank you for telling it like it is! I’m willing to bet 90% of the moms can relate exactly to what you are saying because we’ve all been there. I’m thankful that my girls are 9 and 12 now so I don’t have the sleep problems, but HELLO HORMONES!! However, after I get home from work and get the dinner, homework and middle school drama out of the way, you can bet I’m taking the time to sit and talk with the hubby rather than worry about if floor is clean (it’s not) or if the counters are cleared (their not). Hang in there sweetie, one day you will be sleeping but you will need a MIT trained logistics expert with 10,000 flowcharts to keep track of the practices, homework, school activities, and who “likes” who this week.

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  10. Thank you for your honesty! I too am in the same season of motherhood, your Blake and your Eddie are the exact same ages as my kiddos, and I totally understand what you’re going through. We will get through this! And nutella and Diet Coke certainly help us do that 🙂

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  11. Fantastic. You got this down perfectly.

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  12. You are doing it all right. The only important things are those babies, all of them. I think a good gift for new moms is a cleaning lady for the first 2 months. Enjoy this. Trust me, those are the memories that warm your soul when you can no longer have babies. Love it girl. quit worrying, be happy, smile, kiss and hug.

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  13. Love it! Thanks for keeping it real, Lauren!

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  14. Haha I love this! I am 36 weeks with my first will be getting a dose of this (albeit minor) shortly… you’re amazing!

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  15. Please don’t hate me, I am now an empty nester and there are times I wish I could go back and have at least 1 day with my kids when it was like you are describing.

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  16. This is the most relatable blog post I’ve ever read. Thanks for your honesty! We only have two but it was a HUGE adjustment. And the lack of sleep thing was awful. I hope he starts sleeping soon!

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  17. My kids are 7, 5 and 4. I can’t wait til next year when my youngest goes to 4K for half a day! That will be 3 HOURS TO MYSELF! I remember the days well of having a newborn and a 12 month old and 3 year old all home all day, all by myself. I cried a lot in those days. It was such a relief (and still is) when my husband would call and say he was on his way home from work. I do miss those baby days (when I’m having a bout of insanity) but I am enjoying not having to wipe butts, or peeling their mouths off the shopping cart handle. I love your blog, recipes and sense of humor. I feel like we could be friends if moms had time for friends. You’re doing great 🙂

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  18. Sounds about right! In other news, that first pic is precious.

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  19. Hi Lauren! Love your blog, just have never left a comment! After reading this post I felt compelled! I am a 35 yr old mom to a 7 week old, 2 1/2 yr old and a 7 yr old. You just described my life right now! Hang in there 🙂 I’m hoping for both our sake, it will get easier!

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  20. This post will speak truth to the hearts of all mothers. We all have days when we feel “yes, I’ve got this,” but those days far outnumber the days where our houses are upside down and we’re countdown the hours to bed time. Thank you for being so honest!

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  21. I spent about 6 months between jobs at home with a 3.5/4yo and newborn after being laid off weeks after coming back from maternity leave. I’ve been back at work for 8? months and while I really do miss spending all of that time with my children, the flexibility, etc. I enjoy having a reason to brush my teeth and comb my hair! Having been there, I applaud every single WAH/SAH parent. It’s the hardest gig in the world, in my opinion. A rewarding gig, but hard as heck nonetheless.

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  22. Check out Dr. Harvey Karp’s Happiest Baby on the Block book – it totally saved my sanity with my first kiddo, and now that my second is 10 weeks old, I think it’s made this round of motherhood a lot easier for me! It’s some great soothing and sleep advice, and best of all, there’s a video of the techniques in the book so if you don’t have time to read, you can totally watch the DVD (which I got from the library!) during one of your feedings with baby! Good luck – I’m a blogger too, and I know what you mean about people thinking it’s all perfect when it’s not 🙂

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  23. Thank you for this post, it made me laugh out loud at how typical of a day it is for most mothers & realize that my all too messy house on most days, is probably more common then I think! Your kids are gorgeous, thank you for sharing your yummy recipes & your life with us!

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  24. First off, I have to say I love your blog! I recently became a nanny to a 1 year old little boy. I take care of him every day after school (he goes to Montessori) and this week because we were both on March Break (I’m also a teacher) I spent the week with him. I love the little guy to death and I’ve always wanted children but this week I definitely got a taste of this and let me tell you, I have so much respect for you, stay at home moms, and moms in general. He’s teething, learning to walk, and going through a growth spurt all at the same time and it’s Friday and I’m literally in my pjs and in bed by 8 PM. I get it. Don’t judge why that mom at the grocery store is in sweats and has no make-up on or her hair is in a pony tail. It’s probably the 4th outfit she’s put on herself AND her child today because barf happens. And her hair? Well, I get it, I have my hair pulled about 20 times a day, even in a pony tail. So thank you for being a great mother! I get it… And you’re probably wondering, I wouldn’t trade my job or this week for the world!

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  25. Lauren,
    You may not know it yet, but I admire you so very much. Your blog is as entertaining (? maybe this isn’t the right word to use) as your recipes are. Hang in there. After your previous three children, you should know that it does get better (the two-year-old is probably making you question this). Just enjoy them while they are small;they grow up way too fast!

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  26. You’re doing a great job! Hang in there! (Love your recipes too!)

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  27. I understand completely! I have five kids. The last two are twins. When they were born, I had four kids under three years old. Suicide frequented my mind. My husband was a full time student and worked. I was practically a single mom.
    Now the twins are 4 years old, close to 5. The on,y thing that’s gotten easier is they’re out of diapers and can potty themselves, feed themselves the food I make them, dress themselves etc… But it’s a whole new set of difficulties. The oldest three are in school all day, but that common core… Forget it… And the twins fight like they’re 16, literally… You’re not my sister anymore, you can’t wear that because I wearing the same thing, I telling mom if you touch me again, she’s my friend not yours… It’s crazy. Five minutes later they’re best friends again.
    My 5 year old daughter is bored in school because she’s too smart so she wants extra homework and for me to read to her alllllllllll day. I have two other children to get thru common core with amongst other homework, plus the twins and their daily learning. One of my sons struggles with school work.
    Showers… Forget about it 😉
    My make up is older than my twins by the way. Ha ha. Date nights ended long ago, hard to find a sitter for five.
    Personal time or space… Explain those to me!

    I love your blog and your beautiful family! 😉
    I’m glad to see you’re ‘normal’ like me!

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  28. More power to you! I just gave birth to our FOURTH child March 1st. We now have four kids under the age of 10 and I am 43 years old….not anywhere near youngish. My house and laundry are a mess but thats ok. We are given these tiny blessings for such a short time..housework can wait..and apparently so can sleep..lol. Thanks for the blog…it made me feel better.

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  29. Oh you and I have about the same nightmare going on! LoL Hang in there girl, I feel your pain!
    I have a 7yr old daughter, 1 year old son and 2 week old daughter. I’m relieved to hear you aren’t as perfect as you look-cause I am far from it too!! We mothers all feel the same after long days-and nights. 😉 It’s so worth it! Enjoy the babies while you can…it goes way to fast.

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  30. Thank you for describing me to the “T”! It was like a breath of fresh air to know I’m not alone in my thoughts as a mommy. Xoxo

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  31. Love, LOVE, LOOOOVE this post! Really all of your posts. Husband just said “What?!?” because I have the biggest stupidest grin on my face. I remember every single thing you said happening here 26 and 22 years ago. You are doing a perfect job at the most important job in the world, and – sharing your ideas too?! In my house that’d earn you a YOUdaMAN!!! It does not matter one bit if the house is a disaster (which it really probably isn’t) or you haven’t done laundry. Your kids are happy, and you and the husband are happy! THAT is all that matters!

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  32. Thank you Thank you Thank you – and I thought it was just me. LOL LOL LOL, I remember those days, when I was a human pacifier all freaking night every hour and a half. My oldest didn’t sleep though the night without trying to get into my bed until he was almost six, the second one was four when he finally slept through, so that makes 8 years without sleeping through the night!! I love your honesty, we have all screamed in our pillows, snuck treats, and thought about how it might be worth the night in jail (to sleep) if we locked the toddler in the closet…..
    I got through it by imagining the wonderful men they would someday turn out to be. By the way, that first one that didn’t sleep through the night? He turned 21 today. (PS, they still wake up Mom when they are sick at night). Hang in there, summer is coming.

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  33. Wow, this makes me want to run to my pill pack and make sure I remembered to take one last night! hehe! If it helps, your kids are adorable! Hang in there!

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  34. This post literally made me laugh out loud … more than once! And I know you know that I’m not laughing AT you…because even though my son is now 33 … I SO REMEMBER THOSE DAYS! Some days now I wish I had those days back and really miss them … then I slap myself up the side of my head! LOL

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  35. This pretty much sums up most of my days. It’s nice to know that I’m not the only one who has days like this or feels this way. I have an almost 4 year old (who thinks she’s going on 13) and a 2 year old…. I love your honesty, your blog and your recipes! Thank you!!

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  36. Love this!

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  37. You’re amazing Lauren. I’m glad you did this post so we get a sneak peak. I don’t have kids and I’ve often wondered how you do it all cause I get tired without kids dude! Keep it up!
    Motherhood is the toughest job in the world!

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  38. I normally don’t comment on blog posts, but I just HAD to comment on this one, as it is the best blog post I’ve read in….maybe ever?! As a single mom of two young boys (one with a disability), it’s so refreshing to see someone who does NOT have (or claim to have) the life of a Stepford wife! It’s nice to know there are more of us out there. You rock! Thank you for posting this.

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  39. This is my life, too! But I only have two kids so far (22 and 5 month old!). You didn’t mention poop though! I just wanna go one day without touching anyone else’s poop!!

    I’d love to see an updated version of this! Does Eddie sleep ok now for you?

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